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Out of control
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November 12, 2013 - 1:18 am

Hi my name is Diane and I have an addicted daughter. She has been in recovery using Suboxone for 5 months but her anger is killing me. She blames me for all her problems and I feel guilty. We fight frequently, she calls me names, I yell and things are out of control. Please help me.

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November 12, 2013 - 7:51 am

Diane I find myself in that situation as well sometimes with my AS, what I find that best works for me is no contact till the situation calms down. I just remove myself from the same room as them and when I feel my comfort zone is safe again I'll return. Just tell her "I'm sorry you feel this way" and walk away. Sometimes short-simple tasks work better with them. I hope this helps and good luck with her. It does get better as time goes on.

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November 25, 2013 - 8:16 pm

Hi Diane, I, too, find myself verbally abused by my addicted daughter. I know that she is coming down or dope sick and flies off the handle at every turn. I try not to dwell on the names and anger because I know where it is coming from. Unfortunately, she has a 2 yr old daughter who also lives with me. Her care and well being are being supplied by me, I know that I enable her by turning my head to her activities. I just feel that I am protecting my grandchild from being another statistic as a child of a drug addict. I have to remove myself from her presence or the fight will be on.

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November 26, 2013 - 8:35 am

Hugs

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November 27, 2013 - 12:45 am

Thank You, it is nice to know that I am no longer alone.

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December 5, 2013 - 9:54 pm

Verbal abuse is a very common theme amongst addicts and their loved ones. My addict uses his words as weapons. I often feel like he goes straight for my insecurities, or the jugular, all in an attempt to get me to do what he wants. I am working on changing my reaction to his abuse. I am often successful at not reacting because I know my reaction falls on deaf ears and will only increase my own misery and have no affect on my addict. And a lot of the time when he doesn't get the response he expects, he tries new ways to approach the situation to get what he wants. It can be completely frustrating! But I try to work on my behavior, remind him of my boundary of appropriate respectful conversation, and most importantly, I keep coming here.

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