So, I know a lot of you might not understand why I am so upset or hurt by my addict, because we have never met irl. We have dated for 2 years and had plans to meet this year. He was on probation for possession when we met and he said he was clean and I didn't know how bad it was, or what it really meant until I was already very into him and of course soon after I fell for him. He hid it a lot longer from me than you could if I was there. and I didn't know the signs or how to deal with it, but after 2 years he trusts me and is honest with me when he's sober or is lost. but our issue is he lies a lot .. I have been told it's a side effect of being an addict, that once you learn to live your life that way, even sober lieing becomes second nature. We are fighting so much now. I'm losing him again and he's taking me down with him emotionally.. I know I have to let him go and battle this alone. but I am so scared he will go back to how bad he was when we met, I am afraid he will meet someone else, worse yet, someone who will feed into his addiction for their pleasure. He's my best friend. and I am afraid I became an addict too. Just emotionally. So yeah
Hi <3
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