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Need help understanding.
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November 21, 2020 - 8:01 pm

I am lost. I have lost myself in my BF addiction. I have lost myself trying to save him. And it was an effort lost. He is now not living with me. I cannot trust him. He tells me the problem is ME. Me trying to control him. Me not letting him have free range to run and do as he pleases. He feels like if he gets away from here and me his problem will be solved. He has been telling me he would go to rehab since he had an incident where he was found unconscious in a vehicle. He almost died. Blood sugar was 46. And his kidney tried to shut down. But he told me today he didn’t need rehab. Wasn’t going. Didn’t need help. Just needed to be away from me and my controlling ways and he will be fine. I am struggling. I just need help.

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December 1, 2020 - 9:03 am

I understand completely. My husband is doing the same exact thing right now. We’ve been together since 9th grade and we are now 35. Anyone who knows us can see the love we have for each other (in sobriety) but when he’s in his addictive behavior, everything is my fault, I’m the one who needs help, I’m the one lying, I’m the one not trying,….the guilt and blame he places on me makes me cry and have panic attacks like crazy.

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January 3, 2021 - 11:29 pm

Hi Ladies, this is the same issue I am facing with my husband as well. All my fault even if I ignore him completely. I do my best to let go and let God, but there are times that he trees so hard to hit every nerve I have to upset and blame me for all his issues and insecurities.

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April 12, 2021 - 2:59 pm

Hello Ladies. I am glad you found this group. I hope you pursue this program further. You will learn so much on how to deal with your addicted loved one, and also learn how to take care of yourself. Our meetings are 9:00 pm EST on Monday and Thursday, and 8:30 pm on Saturdays. You will relate to everone in our group and soon make new friends and find much needed support. Hope to see you in our meeting. If not please look for local meetings in your are and give it a try. Good luck

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