Hello there,
My name is Nelly and the addict in my life is my fiance. I have been there always for him and I am starting to feel like I am losing myself. Last year he relapsed 4 times. The most he has gone clean is 30 days. He is now in the process of detox, he's trying to get help and change. I understand Addiction is a disease, but I'm so angry at him. I am starting to believe that he will never change and that we have no future. He really is my everything, I can't picture my life without him, he means the world to me. When he is sober, he is the best man I could ever have, he's the light to my day. When he is using he's someone else, I do not recognize him. I am at a point where I don't think out relationship is healthy, he lies to me all the time, and I have no trust in him. I don't want to leave him while he's in rehab, but I don't want to be with him, and at the same time I do want to be with him, I know that makes no sense. I keep asking myself should I leave? Isn't it enough already? Is it worth it? I have no one to talk to about this because no one in my family knows I am with an addict, and it hurts to have to make up lies everytime he's in rehab.
Hi Nelly2, you will learn tools for coping when you go through the message boards and attend meetings. Does the rehab facility have meetings you can attend or any help for family members? Many substance abuse facilities recognize the importance of working with families of addicts. May God grant you wisdom in dealing with your fiance.
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