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March 30, 2015 - 11:53 am

My name is Mika and my daughter who is 21 is addicted to heroin. She is in her second stay at rehab – a different facility this time – in two months. I wish someone could explain to me how we all got here. I just don't understand with all the information that in the world today about how addictive and destructive and how lethal heroin is and everything else that comes with it — why anyone in their right mind would even take the first shot. My daughter is the world to me. I have heard all the stuff it is not my fault. There is nothing I have done that made her to this. There is nothing I have done that makes her take the next shot. Blah, Blah, Blah. I know she has to WANT to stop. I know all this – but I feel totally broken. Some how some where along the line I failed her as a parent and no one can tell me otherwise at this moment. I am so lost at this point. This is an illness and I have been strong and very supportive to this point but the world out there keeps coming at her and I can't stop it. I try to lean on god and hand this over to him – it works for awhile until the next thing happens. The lies, the drugs, the health issues, disappearing on me, etc.

Personally if I had my way I would eradicate every drug and dope dealer off of the face of this earth. I am angry.

Why is the world this way? Why are there so many evil people out there praying on the week in this world? What has happened to us as human beings? I always wanted a child but now I am so sorry that I brought her into this awful world where she is in so much pain and there isn't a damned thing I can do stop her. I would gladly take over this illness myself and ruin my life to relieve her of this demon. She is so smart, talented and so sweet — what the He– happened?

If anyone out there can enlighten me how to better cope and help my daughter I am all ears.

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