My name is Claire and I've been with my boyfriend (who is a heroin addict) for the last 9 years. I wouldn't say it's been a solid 9 years for there has been much trial and error. Anyway, I was an active member of CoDA as well a couple years ago when he got clean and left me because I was at a low point from all the hardships I went through. Two years later, and my boyfriend is back in rehab for another 25-30 days, and we are already having these codependent problems again. I always fear that when he gets better he doesn't need me as much, almost as if he's better than I am. We've been fighting because my insecurities from his lying and infidelity in the last two years has really affected me, to the point where I fear he will leave me the same way as before. I'm really struggling trying to let go of the past and have a better relationship, because I do care greatly about him and have always really wanted a good, loving, happy relationship with him. I'm here to work through my past issues, hear others stories, and find ways to heal myself so that I can get better, and feel better, to hopefully not lose my relationship and make this better for real this time.
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