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Help please, ignored after rehab
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2 Posts
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September 11, 2017 - 6:09 am

Hi everyone! My name is Nina and I'm new here, glad to find this space. I wanted to share briefly what happened and wondered if it happened to anyone. If so, what did you do, or if you ever got an answer?

A loved one of mine was addicted to heroin. During their rough time, I was always supportive of them and their goal of achieving sobriety. When they said they were going to rehab I was super happy for them and supportive. (btw just to add I'm a sober person (always been) and I've only ever done sober activities with this loved one) When they came back from rehab they seemed stronger but deep down I felt this sense of pain. If they ever wanted to spend time with me, I let them come to me and never pressured them. I encouraged fun sober activities like exercise, being out in nature, rockclimbing, cooking, which they really enjoyed.

Suddenly, they disappeared. Not a word. I then found out (not from the loved one) that they went to another rehab. After a period of time, I reached out to this loved one and got NO response. It made me really confused wondering why they would be so communicative during the first rehab and happy to rekindle our bond, but to then disappear off the face of the earth after the next rehab…. I wonder why they would have to ignore my existence completely when I was a positive influence….

Anybody ever experience this before? Was it my fault, something I did wrong that made them never want to speak again? Is this a phase/permanent? Help?

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1 Posts
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November 13, 2017 - 8:15 pm

I am sorry that happened and I wish I had something fo tell you. Instead I send a virtual hug..

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November 14, 2017 - 5:18 pm

[i]I wonder why they would have to ignore my existence completely when I was a positive influence….[/i]
This is why. Take care of yourself. As hard as that is to do, it is the only thing you can do.

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August 2, 2018 - 5:06 am

That's what I'm afraid of my boyfriend said the rehab suggests a year to not be in a relationship so they can focus on there recovery. I'm afraid he'll find someone else or decide he doesn't want me anymore

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August 12, 2018 - 9:00 am

I know it’s hard to accept but one of the sayings I learned through Naranon was Let go Let god and trust me when it’s time for the both of you to come back together you will. If you try to force it before then it may backfire. Give your friend the space and time needed. It’s very important to accept and will be even harder to do but it will be worth it in the end. Good Luck.

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September 25, 2018 - 5:05 pm

I am in the same boat. I have supported and helped my boyfriend through so much in the past year. Once we get through all the court dates and required IOP classes. He just drops me like I was nothing. Leaving me wondering what the hell I did wrong?? And it makes you feel as though being loving and kind is worthless. I’m giving him space to work on him now and try to not force anything but I am desperate for an explanation!

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