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February 3, 2019 - 7:28 am

Hi, this is my first time at this forum. Our 32 year old son has a chronic physical illness for which he is on disability. He has chronic pain and he doesn't respond to any of the medications for his illness. He smokes cannabis in order to deal with the pain and has used more and more over the years. His habit was up to $3000 buying cannabis from a legal state. He could no longer fund his use with just his disability and ran out of savings. He had been living with us and we agreed to fund for him if he would get off the opiates he was on: Fentynal and Oxycodone. He asked us several times if we would promise to support him in cannabis if he got off other painkillers and we agreed, but neglected to find out how much money we were agreeing to . After the first month of funding we realized how much it was costing and we were driving to legal state to get for him. Seemed unsustainable. Also he seemed to be more and more worked up emotionally, somewhat paranoid, not trusting his doctors. He said he had to move to California to be able to grow his own cannabis and wanted us to pay for supporting him out there. He told us for years that cannabis not addictive and there was no way he was addicted. After telling him we can't afford California nor $3000 month, we said since he lives with us and we support him we would like to go to doctors with him to see what they are saying. He said doctors where we live told him they can no longer help him. We weren't sure if that was really true or not. Anyway, he was very angry and refused us going to his doctors with him, ended up in physical fight between our son and my husband, his father. Our son left in the middle of the night, saying that we tried to kill him which is not true. He found a way to get to California and is out there now. He is still very physically ill and says he can't have relationship with us until we get psychological help. We can't tell how much of this is mental illness on his part or is there addiction to cannabis that could cause all of this crazy behavior on his part. Our son used to be a sweet guy and he has become infuriated at doctors and at us. He says he is the victim, big time. We are no longer supporting him and he says that he will do it on his own if it kills him and that it probably will. He says they can put on his tombstone that we tried to kill him and therefore he died trying to take care of himself despite his serious physical illness. He lays the guilt on really thick so we have blocked him from our cell phones and not talking to him. But, I worry about him and wish we had done things differently, keep waking up at night thinking about him.

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